Last week I decided what the world really needed right now was a blog written by me, a middle-aged housewife with no writing experience and a life that could hardly be described as exciting. So what prompted this decision? As I said in my last post, I have read some excellent blogs of a few people I follow on twitter and felt the need to jump in. I have kept diaries in the past, I have a record of so many of my Januarys, but time issues and inertia kick in around February and the acres of blank space stare out accusingly. I now keep a sort of scrapbook , where I keep theatre tickets, quotes from poems, newspaper articles I have liked and the such. But why? Is it the desire to put something down in black and white that I think will be read by my grandchildren?A desire to say " hey I exist, listen to me"?
When I read the blogs of others its like being party to their worlds, like little pieces of people's lives, small personal novellas. I find myself smiling, agreeing, sympathising. I want to be part of that too.
When some people are diagnosed with terminal illnesses, they feel the need to write letters, to create "memory boxes". Its to ensure they do not feel they will be forgotten, to express feelings for loved ones they want to echo down the years. I admit when I was diagnosed with a serious illness five years ago, I wrote letters to my husband and daughter. Then I re-read them and frankly, they were terrible, I ripped them up. My wonderful father-in-law had a very long illness, he never wrote a word, yet we all talk of him constantly four years after his death. He is remembered in so many ways, but I think of him every time I hear an Italian voice, hear an aria, cook one of his recipes or see his expressions on the face of my husband.
I guess what I am trying to say in a convoluted manner ( bear with me, it's my first proper post!) is that I am not in this for immortality, just to fill a need for self-expression I didn't know I had, until it was awoken by the power of Twitter!
I am reading "A Week In December" by Sebastian Faulks at the moment and the title of this post comes from a quote of one of the characters. I don't know if it is the view of Mr Faulks himself, but I don't care. He has his considerable skills as an author to express himself. For me, it appears to be blogging, and for the moment, it feels good!